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Thursday, November 19, 2009

How can you tell?

I am writing this post at the same time I am SUPPOSED to be at the Temple with my very dear friend. Why am I not there? Great question! Maybe you could all help me out on this one.

Emily has had chronic stomach pain for a long time. The last two weeks have been extra bad because she was on Omnicef for a sinus infection. She has taken this many times before BUT I guess it can cause bad stomach pain.

I took her off the medicine on Monday and she has been eating and acting more like "normal." When I ask how she's doing she always tells me, "It's NOT better mom, I just get sick of saying owe" hmmm

Last night she kept us all up because her tummy and her leg and her arm hurt. She even seemed to have some diarrhea. When she was eating breakfast her pain seemed worse then usual so I decided to give her the option of staying home; reminding her of course that this would mean NO PLAYING after school. She thought about it and decided she would stay home.

After dropping the kids off she kept telling me things like, "Mom, it's never good to lie about being sick because then you don't get to play." and "Mom, I am sorry you can't go to the Temple." Very sweet don't you think?

This takes us to my dilemma, She is now downstairs in front of the TV with paper, tape, markers and crayons spread all over the floor. She came up wanting me to help her make a scrapbook!!! Not a sign of a very sick child is it?

I looked at her and explained that if she is really sick, this means she is too sick to work on crafts like a scrapbook.
"I am sick mom"
"I believe you but if you are too sick to do school work then you are too sick to do a scrapbook."
"Oh"

This is the struggle. All of her life I have tried to make her "sick" days fun because she has been so miserable. I know her stomach hurts but unlike most children it doesn't seem to be going away any time soon. She has to live with more pain then most of us do. I don't know if I am being too rough on her just because she has learned to deal with her pain without having to be laying on a couch all day or is she taking me for a ride???? How can I tell?

I guess it's time to set some new ground rules for what happens when you stay home sick. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated :)

5 comments:

Amber said...

I was laughing most the way through your post because I've had similar conversations! I only wish I had written them down. And yet, I realize your situation makes the whole thing more complicated.

Unless you get a direct impression, I don't think you can tell without holding them accountable and letting them decide. At my house, I've had to say no movies, crafts or even books on tape when sick unless there is a fever, throwing up or some dramatic sign. My kids could listen to books on tape all day. If tapes are an option with no chores and other responsibilities because of illness, my younger kids have no reason to get well if they are sick- and every reason to be sick. It is just human nature to pick easy over hard if we have the choice.

As for Emily and pain being a regular deal for her, I don't know what you should do. Keep us posted! We're in suspense. Maybe now and then, she needs a break...but of course, if she's like the rest of us, she'll try and take advantage of it.

Angie said...

Kids can be a little tricky huhn! I think you did great and she will miss her friends this afternoon when I have my daughter call her to play and invite her for a late night!

marilyn said...

Em has learned to make the best of things and not to complain so it is hard because she is so tough, but I was relieved when you said when you took her off the medicine she was eating, that is my big worry right now with her not eating. You always know what to do Jill I trust you completely you are an awesome mom, just enjoy her and that is easy to do, she is just a little too smart!!!!! love you and you are always in our prayers she can't get sick for Thanksgiving so keep her eating!!!

Jolyn Buhrley said...

Aunt Jolyn would give her a big fluffy pillow,slippers,and robe. Serve her icecream,sprite,and cinnamon rolls. I would sit and scrapbook with her ALL day. I would rub her feet and paint her nails. Hmmmmmm to bad I live in Boise. Poor thing...!!:):)

Oh, this is funny. Parenting is so mentally exhausting isn't it!!??

Monica said...

I love that child! A girl after my own heart! I ditch things in my life to stay home and scrapbook! On a serious note, I know you will know what to do! I got stomach aches my whole life, especially when I was Em's age. They never could figure out what was wrong. If you figure it out, I'd love to know the cure! I'm like Em though I just keep doing things to take my mind off of them! Goodluck!